I was told my
uncle was gay at a very young age. I
remember feeling uncomfortable about the information I was given due to the
fact that being gay was so looked down upon.
I remember clearly one summer we took a vacation to see my uncle who lived
in Florida. On one occasion when we were
out to eat with him and his partner, a man walk by our table and made several
rude comments about how being gay was a sin and they should not be allowed to
show affection in public. The man stated
additional comments that should never have been said, especially in the
presence of a child.
This display of
hate diminished my uncle’s rights and equity.
My uncle and his partner have just as many rights to go out to eat
dinner as anyone else. The incident was
very prejudice and was clear that gay rights were not where they are today.
I remember
feeling very uncomfortable and scared during this confrontation. I also felt a sense of sadness and began to
understand the feelings of others on a deeper level. This one incident made such an impact on
me. I cannot imagine how often of an occurrence
this must have been for my uncle and the struggles he encountered to feel
visible and validated.
Everyone needs
to become more aware and more educated of the differences of others. In this particular case, the language that
was used was very demeaning and derogatory.
Looking back, I do not feel that my uncle handled himself in a very
positive manner either. I think the
situation could have been less elevated if he would have spoken calmly to the
man and asked him to be considerate due to the fact that there was a child
present. Instead their voices were
raised and it created an uneasy scene in the restaurant.
Erika, isn't is amazing what we remember from our childhood... I think that your uncle reacted in the way any other indidivual would have in a similar situation. A part of who he is was attacked, and perhaps, looking at it from his perspective, he might have been personally upset and also a bit embarrassed in front of his niece. Perhaps, he anger was a combination of both. Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteHi Erika,
ReplyDeleteI too was faced at a young age, having several gay relatives coming "out of the closet". But I still remember the day one of my close and older cousin telling us he was gay, and also being the first one up until then, in my family ever admitting they were gay. I must have been about 7 or 8 years old, and even though I did know what gay meant, I never ever saw him differently from that day on, I still don't, but unfortunately others in my family didn't feel the same way. He said he wanted to tell all of us now, because he knew we would be hearing some bad things about him, and maybe even from others in the family. Even though we were all very surprised, and never suspected it, my parents and most of the family were very supportive. Of course there were those other family members that weren't so understanding or supportive, just as he had suspected. In fact they were very mean and hurtful and refused to associate with him, some for a long time, and others never again. But for a lot of them I guess it was mostly fear of the unknown, I mean this was more than thirty years ago, and things were a lot different. Of course now things for the most part are better, and people are more supportive, and I don't think there's so much of that fear to remain hidden, or "in the closet". Great job and thanks for sharing.
Sylvia
Erika,
ReplyDeleteI was trying to remember when I first understood the concept of homosexuality or even knew a person that was lesbian or gay. I graduated from college in 1981 and never met an openly gay person until I was out of college. I am glad that times have changed and that people in many parts of the country are openly gay and able to express themselves without fear of reprisal.
Thank you for sharing. More often than not children are present in instances when prejudice is shown and when this occurs it just keeps the behavior being passed on. It is difficult sometimes to not recognize who is around us when we get upset, but hopefully someone will speak up for those who shouldn't hear.
ReplyDeleteHi Erica,
ReplyDeleteI have lesbian friends and my best friend is a lesbian, but we have to keep this as a secret and my lesbian friends decided to stay in the closet because people in China still have huge prejudice and bias about gay/lesbian people. When I hear people giving bad comments on these people I feel angry and uncomfortable. These people should have the same rights as everyone else.
Lufei